A lifetime cultivated
To spend a lifetime earning external wealth for that day when work is done. Once arrived, one's external accumulated wealth is fuel for the next life chapter. For now wanting to live a different kind of life. But one does not arrive with external accumulations alone.
As one gains external riches, one simultaneous gains a specific internal state. A state of mind, a way of being, behaviours, believes are formed over time. This personal state is formed so gaining these external riches was possible. This internal state matches the life lived so far. So over time, one accumulates and cultivates, externally and internally.
One tends to form an internal state in function of making external goals. I have to be this person so I can make that goal. I have to be more this or more that so I can make this external thing. Once the goal is reached, one is left with a complex of urges and behaviours that made reaching that goal possible. These behaviours and believes have mass, they have momentum, as they have been formed over a long time. They are ingrained deeply and are seen as identity.
The question arrises on how one would arrive at key moments in one's life. The hard working man arrives with his external wealth, but a lifetime of behavioural momentum is pushing him to keep living the old life. It is difficult to change, to enjoy, to rest. They say it is easy to be lazy, but yet he can not.
To some degree there is a mismatch between the new desired lifestyle and the accumulated internal state. One tends to arrive with abundant external riches but with a neglected worn out body, poorly cultivated skills that support other domains of life, a life time unexplored self, a poor idea of what one wants. The truly life desired, if one is still able to fathom it. Will rest on a internal state that will have difficulty to support it.
It is to ponder and to be wary for what one is cultivating inside when going through life. As one arrives in each moment with external riches and with the constitution that made that external richness happen.